How to Release the Fear of Letting Go

     "Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on."
~ Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now  

     Many years ago, my family briefly had a pet cockatiel named Angel.  He was named Angel because of his beautiful white plumage.  But Angel was no angel!  He started out as a pet belonging to a friend. But Angel did not get along with my friend's other cockatiels. He was a bit of a bully! When my daughter expressed interest in having a cockatiel, my friend happily gave him to us.

     It was agreed that Angel should stay in my daughter's bedroom, next to her 2 parakeets.  This arrangement worked well for a few months.  But when the parakeets died, Angel was alone in my daughter's room while she was in school. We became concerned about his isolation and moved him to the family room.  However, the family cats agitated him. And his daily periods of loud screeching were disruptive to the household.  Even my daughter agreed that it wasn't working out.  But she was very reluctant to let him go, for fear that she would never see him again.

Restoring Flow

     When we are in fear, we are in our lower self. Our lower self experiences life as "not enough" because when we are in our lower self, our energy state is disrupted and feels not enough.  In a state of "not enough" we don't trust in the flow of life.  We fear that if we let go, we'll be left with nothing.  In this state of not enough, our energy isn't flowing and we aren't experiencing the flow of abundance.

     One exercise I use to restore energy flow I call "release-receive breathing." Spend ten minutes in slow, deep breathing while focusing on releasing what no longer serves you with each exhale, and focusing on receiving with each inhale.

     Here are some examples of what you could say out loud or silently with each exhale:

• I release fear
• I release stagnation
• I release lack
• I release mistrust
• I release control

    Here are some examples of what you could say out loud, or silently to yourself with each inhale:

• I receive love
• I receive energy
• I receive abundance
• I receive trust
• I receive support

     This is a slow, rhythmic exercise that re-establishes your natural energy flow and builds your trust in the flow of life.

A Loving Solution for Angel

     I had no idea how I would rehome Angel in a way that was acceptable.  I didn't want to just give him away to anyone.  I finally let go of the situation and asked that a solution present itself. And the solution came right through my front door!

     I held Girl Scout meetings in my home and the girls all admired Angel.  One of the mothers took a special interest in him. As the meeting was breaking up, she asked me a lot of questions about what was involved in owning a cockatiel. She was looking for a pet for her son with special needs. And it had to be a pet without fur due to allergies in the household. She wanted to know how much it cost to own a cockatiel, and how much the cage, toys and food cost, as she was on a tight budget.

     It suddenly occurred to me that this was the perfect solution for Angel.  He and his paraphernalia  could go to a loving family where he could be outside of his cage and not be bothered by cats; a family who might not have been able to afford a pet otherwise; a home where he would help a little boy with special needs.  And my daughter could still visit Angel.

     It was a win-win situation for us, Angel, and his new owners. And it was a solution I did not have to seek.  I only had to receive.

     My daughter did visit Angel in his new home.  And he remembered her, gently rubbing his beak against her cheek while making contented clucking sounds. Once she saw how happy he was in his new home, she trusted that we had made the right decision.

     I recently ran into this Girl Scout mother and she said Angel is still alive and well, albeit with some arthritis in his claws.  It's as if Angel was always meant for them and we were simply the vehicle to get him there.

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How to Change Your Energy Vibration

       "The way you talk about yourself and your life - your story - has a great deal to do with what shows up in your day-to-day experience. If you think of yourself as a victim...you find plenty of evidence to support that viewpoint."  ~ David Emerald Womeldorff, The Power of TED (The Empowerment Dynamic)

     I have four animals in my home who form a pack. The alpha female of the pack is my cat Penny, and boy does she let you know her place in the home! She assertively announces her presence to anyone who visits. When I'm working on my laptop at my desk, she uses her paws (with claws extended!) to pull my face toward her, demanding my attention. The dogs are afraid of her! Penny does not hesitate to remind them that she is Queen. If they dare walk too close to her, they get a swat across the face.

      This is Penny amidst my potted plants, Queen of the table-top jungle.

     Next in the pack hierarchy comes Stanley the dog, who is dominant over Lexi the dog. And at the bottom of the pack, the omega male, is Tony the cat.

     Tony is a huge, beautiful Maine Coon afraid of his own shadow. When anyone comes to the house, he usually hides. Although Tony is bonded with Penny, with the dogs it's a different story. For seven years Tony has been afraid to come into the kitchen because of the dogs. There are gates in place to keep the dogs in the kitchen-family room to prevent them from attacking Tony. But the dogs will charge toward Tony through the gates, seemingly unprovoked. This just terrifies him.

     Here is Tony in his usual position, lounging on his favorite blanket.

     You may say, "Poor Tony," and wonder -- why are the dogs being so "mean" to him? But Tony is not a victim. Tony is a creator. More about that later.

What Vibration Are You In?

     I know a lot of people who feel like Tony, who cannot understand why people mistreat them, and violate their boundaries with unsolicited and unwanted advice. They don't understand why people seem to think they aren't competent enough to make their own decisions.The reason people treat you the way they do is because they are unconsciously reading your energy. If your energy is vibrating in unsure and uncertain, this attracts advise. If your energy field is contracted and pulled in due to insecurity, others with automatically fill what they perceive as a void by extending themselves into your space. Just like the dogs charge toward Tony.

     There is nothing wrong or bad with whatever state your energy vibrates in. And there's nothing wrong or bad with how people react to your energy vibrations. Because there's no judgement in energy! The point of all this is this: The way people react to you gives you valuable information!  It shows you what vibration you are putting out into the world. And once you realize what you are vibrating in, what was unconscious becomes conscious and you can do something about it.

The Choice is Yours
 
     You have two choices in how to react once you realize the state of your energy...judgment or acceptance. If you judge yourself for your unsure vibration, you keep your energy contracted and your frequency low. If you accept yourself unconditionally, this will expand and center your energy. Because your natural state is to be in your heart and acceptance centers you in your heart. The choice is yours. Because you are the creator of your own life.

     Here's an affirmation: Even though my energy has been vibrating in ______, I choose to change it by lovingly accepting myself. 

Remembering the Truth

     When my daughter was home for Christmas, she spent a lot of time with Tony. She told him what a courageous and brave kitty he is, pumping him up and repeatedly bringing him to the other side of the kitchen gate. I was astonished to find that after her visit, Tony's behavior completely changed. My daughter's loving attention and acceptance had shifted his energy. It was as if she helped him remember who he really is. Now the dogs no longer charge him. When I open the gate, he walks into the kitchen right past the dogs, completely confident in himself.

     For seven years Tony had lived through a false premise about himself, that he was a prey animal. Tony had forgotten that he is a feline, descended from the big cats -- master predators just as powerful as the wolves that the household canines descended from. Tony had been creating attack by putting out a prey vibration, but now that he remembers who really is, his changed energy vibration creates safety.

     What false belief do you have about yourself?  Have you forgotten who you really are? The truth is, no matter what has happened to you, no matter what has been done to you and no matter what you think you've done -- you are whole, complete and valuable -- always and forever.

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How Our Pets Can Show Us What Needs to Heal

    "Always say 'yes' to the present moment...Surrender to what is. Say 'yes' to life - and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you."  ~ Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now

     This evening my dog Lexi was barking like crazy at the windows because there was a strange dog in the neighbor's yard.  Nothing I did could get her to stop. She can be domineering and territorial.  Ever since I got her, I have tried to assert myself as her pack leader.  Lexi is eager to please and wants to do what I ask.  She will lie on her side in a surrender position when I ask her to. But the thing is, she never actually surrenders!  It seems no matter how long I ask her to stay in the surrender position, her body remains tense, ready to jump back up and resume barking.

     And then it dawned on -- she is a mirror of me!

     Lately I have been struggling to surrender to various life circumstances.  Like Lexi, I know how to go through the motions of surrender, but I rarely actually get there! I keep getting in my own way, trying to solve everything rather than turning it over and trusting that all is occurring in the exact right time and in the exact right way -- even when it doesn't seem to be.

     So I took a deep breathe and mustered as much patience with Lexi as I could, staying with her until she completely relaxed and let out a deep sigh.  She had surrendered...and so did I.  Thank you Lexi!

     If you are struggling to let go, be patient. Stay with your deep breathing for as long as it takes you to reach a state of relaxation. Eventually, you will surrender.

      

      For more energy healing solutions for sensitive and creative women, subscribe to this blog and go to my website to subscribe to my newsletter and receive a FREE recording "3 Keys to Removing the Blocks to Getting What You Want in Life" and a power-packed Energy Medicine Resource Bundle with handouts for my most effective energy healing skills! While you are there, check out my award-winning books that contain everything you need to know to live a healing way of life and awaken your greater health.

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How to Let Go of Worry

     "Even if it's well-intended, worry blankets the poor recipient's energy field in a negative vibe. Imagine a black Express Mail envelope marked 'Thinking of You' with much, mildew and a few skull bones." ~ Tosha Silver in Outrageous Openness

     We have an old beagle whose health had been deteriorating recently -- our dear Stanley. It got so bad he could hardly move and we were carrying him outside to do his business.  My mind went to worst-case scenarios of what had been suggested to us in the past - heart disease and disc disease. It broke my heart to see my super-active, mischievous little hound dog reduced to an invalid.  I worried about him constantly - day and night. It was making me sick and clouding my ability to see things clearly. And then I had a dream.

     In the dream, in order for Stanley to get better I had to surrender him.  In the dream I was very sad, but also felt a great sense of relief and peace that I didn't have to worry about him any more. When I awoke, I was initially horrified by the idea of surrendering my own beloved dog, but then I understood that dreams are metaphors.  What I needed to surrender was not Stanley, but the worry.

     The next day Stanley was seen by a new veterinarian who determined his issues were not nearly as bad as we had thought -- and easily treatable. Stan responded quickly to a new treatment protocol and soon was back to running around the yard. Who knows what the future holds for him, but worrying about it does him and me no good and is actually detrimental.  Because the body cannot tell the difference between an awful thing that is actually happening or if you are just thinking about the awful thing. You will experience debilitating stress regardless. I choose to live in the moment, as Stanley does. I choose peace.

     If you find yourself worrying, try one of these:

     1. If you are dwelling on past experiences and worrying about the future, bring yourself back to the present moment by focusing on your breathing and what you see, hear, smell, taste and feel in your current environment.

     2. Send love and acceptance to the part of you that is worried and afraid.

     3. If you are worried about a person, say a prayer:

     "If it is in the highest good of _____, I ask that their suffering be relieved and that any dysfunctional connection between myself and this person that causes me to take on their suffering be severed. Please fill us both with love, light and spiritual power."

 

      For more energy healing solutions for sensitive and creative women, subscribe to this blog and go to my website to subscribe to my newsletter and receive a FREE recording "3 Keys to Removing the Blocks to Getting What You Want in Life" and a power-packed Energy Medicine Resource Bundle with handouts for my most effective energy healing skills! While you are there, check out my award-winning books that contain everything you need to know to live a healing way of life and awaken your greater health.

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There Are No Coincidences

     “Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics."  

∼ Albert Einstein, Ph.D., The World as I See It

         As a dog lover, I do on rare occasions look at pictures of dogs for adoption, even though I already have two. Dogs are addictive. Like potato chips, you can’t just get one. The other day I did indulge myself and take a peek online at the website where we adopted one of our rescues, and a bonded pair caught my eye – a yellow lab and a cocker spaniel  The description of the dogs said that one couldn't survive without the other and they would have to be adopted as a pair.

     I couldn't help but imagine what it would be like to add these two to our household and daydreamed about them for a few minutes.

     The very next day I was getting out of my car in a parking lot and looked to the side to see someone with two dogs – a yellow lab and a cocker spaniel. I did a double-take. Was this the same couple I had seen online?  No – the coloring was a little different. But what are the odds of coming across two dogs almost identical to the ones I had just looked at online the day before?

    Most people would probably dismiss this experience as coincidence. But these occurrences happen to me frequently and I know from my study of quantum physics that there are no true coincidences! At least not in the way we define coincidence. Coincidence is defined as a remarkable concurrence of events without apparent causal connection. However, even though the causal connection may not be apparent, there is indeed a connection.

     What we focus on creates our reality. I had been focused on a yellow lab and a cocker spaniel – and a yellow lab and cocker spaniel then appeared in my environment. Imagine what we can manifest if we focus on what we want – like health!

     If your focus is on illness and disease - that is what you create. If your focus is on health and vibrancy - that is what you create. Now it’s easier for me to manifest a dog sighting because I have no emotional baggage related to dogs. If you have emotional baggage related to your health - that creates a block to manifesting.

      In order to manifest what you want, you have to fully express your negativity first. If you are focused on illness and disease because that is what you are dealing with, you can’t deny that or suppress your anger, fear or sadness about it in order to shift into thoughts of health. It doesn’t work very well. 

     So allow yourself to fully express how mad, sad, frustrated, or overwhelmed you are -- or whatever it is you are feeling. Go ahead and have a meltdown. Journal about it. Talk about it. Cry about it. Stomp your feet about it. Have a healthy tantrum and let the fear out. And take deep breaths while you are doing so. When you feel better – then you can focus on health, and imagine what it would feel like to feel completely healthy. Or whatever your heart's desire is. This is the process of manifestation.

     By the way....in case you are wondering, the bonded pair of dogs I saw online did get adopted together. :)

     
     For more energy healing solutions for sensitive and creative women, subscribe to this blog and go to my website to subscribe to my newsletter and receive a FREE recording "3 Keys to Removing the Blocks to Getting What You Want in Life" and a power-packed Energy Medicine Resource Bundle with handouts for my most effective energy healing skills! While you are there, check out my award-winning books and programs that can teach you everything you need to know to live a healing way of life and awaken your greater health.

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How to Feel More Connected to Others

     "If starlings have shown up in your life....They can teach you how to be more effective within groups. For large numbers to live at peace in a community, there must be an ability to communicate...more clearly..."            ~ Ted Andrews,  Animal Speak: The Spiritual & Magical Powers of Creatures Great & Small

     Many years ago a baby starling fell from his nest on Mother's Day.  I couldn't even tell what kind of bird this helpless, featherless baby was.  A wildlife rehabilitator gave me instructions in how and what to feed him. And he grew quickly! As his feathers came in and his yellow beak became brighter, I realized he was a starling, like this baby bird:

     As the starling matured, the wildlife rehabilitator instructed me in how to help him transition back to the woods. I moved him out of the house and into a cage on our deck near the woods. And then I started to leave the cage door open. The bird began to spend more and more time out of the cage roosting in the trees at the edge of the woods, returning to the cage less and less. 

     Each morning I would slide open the back door and call to him, and he would answer me and come for food. Or come pecking at the glass door when he was hungry. Sometimes he would just answer me without coming for food, and we would communicate back and forth with me matching his bird sounds. 

     This is a picture of him in his bird cage on our deck.

     And then one morning he was gone.

     I called out to him for days, but he did not answer. As his surrogate mother, I assumed the worst and worried that he had fallen prey to some predator.

    A year later, weeks before we were scheduled to move, a starling showed up at my back door and began pecking at the glass. When I opened the door, he studied me for a moment, and then flew away. I have no doubt this was "my" starling reconnecting before my move. He brought me reassurance by communicating the message that he was alive and well. 

Energetic Connection

     I believe the baby starling fell into my life all those years ago to teach me about connection through communication. The medicine of starling spirit teaches us how to effectively connect to others through energy and words. 

     Starlings form huge flocks, moving fluidly through the sky and creating spectacular formations. The birds are able to fly in perfect synchrony with each other because they are in constant communication through a principle of physics called wave resonance. 

     Humans are also in sync with each other and all of life through the collective consciousness, our oneness with the universal energy field. This field is thought to contain the collective psyche, intelligence, and wisdom of humanity.

     Even when we feel isolated and disconnected, we are all connected and can experience subtle communication with each other through the medium of the universal energy field.  Here are ways to feel that connection:

• Close your eyes and shift into a meditative state by emptying your mind and focusing on your breathing for a few minutes. 
• Imagine that you are breathing in and of your heart, receiving energy with your inhale and releasing energy with your exhale
• Now picture others you want to feel more connected to and send them unconditional love.

Connecting Communication

      You can feel more connected to others through verbal communication from the heart:

• Reflect back what others says to you without the overlay of your own opinion, without placing blame, and without conditions.
• Own your own feelings with "I" statements  -- Instead of "You make me sad" (blaming- creates defensiveness), try "I feel sad" (claiming - creates connection)
• Provide clarity by stating what would help the situation without opinion, blame or conditions. 

    Our words carry the energy of our intentions. If your intention in connecting to others is in the highest good of all, that is the energy that you transmit.

       For more energy healing solutions for sensitive and creative women, subscribe to this blog and go to my website to subscribe to my newsletter and receive a FREE recording "3 Keys to Removing the Blocks to Getting What You Want in Life" and a power-packed Energy Medicine Resource Bundle with handouts for my most effective energy healing skills! While you are there, check out my award-winning books and programs that can teach you everything you need to know to live a healing way of life and awaken your greater health.

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How to Release Fear

     "Everything you want is on the other side of fear."  ~ Jack Canfield, The Success Principles

     With so many changes taking place in the world, many people are frightened. My clients are doing their best to stay out of fear by thinking positive, but underneath - the fear is still there.  "How do I get rid of it?" they ask me.  My answer - let the big dog out!

     The harder you try to keep the big dog of fear quiet and in the closet, the more he tries to bark and claw his way out. What you end up with is a positive thought on top of a pile of barking, snarling fear- which is not very positive at all.

     How do you let the big dog out?  

• Let yourself feel the fear.  
• For the moment, let it get even bigger.  
• Move with it.  
• Breathe with it. 
• Open your mouth and make noise with it. 

     Let that big dog of fear run as far and as fast and make as much noise as he wants for as long as he wants. Trust me, he can't do it forever. Eventually he'll tire out and flop on his side on the ground in peaceful surrender. No more barking, snarling, or clawing. Just peace and quiet. Now that feels more positive.

   
      For more energy healing solutions for sensitive and creative women, subscribe to this blog and go to my website to subscribe to my newsletter and receive a FREE recording "3 Keys to Removing the Blocks to Getting What You Want in Life" and a power-packed Energy Medicine Resource Bundle with handouts for my most effective energy healing skills! While you are there, check out my award-winning books and programs that can teach you everything you need to know to live a healing way of life and awaken your greater health.

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How to Heal Fear

           "That's the thing about fear. Death will kill you once, but fear kills you over and over and over, if you let it."  ~ Marcus Allen, Astrology for the New Age

     When I was a teenager, a stray dog showed up at our property and appointed himself our watchdog. He patrolled the wrought iron fence and barked at anyone who walked by. He had decided he was our dog, and we agreed, naming him Red after his golden-red coat of fur. His breed? We could only guess – Golden Retriever? A bit of Collie?   

         
     Red was friendly and sociable, but he would yelp in panic and dive under furniture at the sound of a car backfiring or a gun firing on TV.  He had arrived at our house with a streak of singed fur along his temple and we made up a backstory that he had been grazed by a bullet that passed near his head. Since he already knew how to sit, stay, roll over and shake paws, we concluded his previous owners had taught him tricks. But when we tried to brush him, he cowered and winced at the sight of the brush, as if he had been abused.

                
     In my active imagination, I pictured Red escaping from his abusers in a dramatic scene that included gunfire. I envisioned him wandering in a daze for many miles, until he came upon our house and decided we needed him. Whatever the real story, I was grateful for the angel dog that had come out of nowhere at a time when I desperately needed protection and unconditional love.

     Red died over 30 years ago, not long after I left home and got married. The way he died is too awful to recount here, but let it suffice to say that it was fear that killed him. It was his fear of loud noises that caused him to panic and try to escape his enclosure – inadvertently ending his life in the process.

    Fear may not kill us as swiftly as it did Red. But fear can kill us slowly. It robs us of happiness and joy. It destroys our courage and blocks our growth. It eats away at our health. But fear is not something we can escape. Rather, fear can be transformed.  How?  Through compassion, unconditional love, and self-acceptance.  

     Here is an affirmation to help you heal fear:

     Even though I am in fear, I love, accept and forgive myself completely and deeply.  Every part of me is acceptable and worthy of love, even the part of me that is in fear.

     RIP my dear friend Red.   

   

      For more energy healing solutions for sensitive and creative women, subscribe to this blog and go to my website to subscribe to my newsletter and receive a FREE recording "3 Keys to Removing the Blocks to Getting What You Want in Life" and a power-packed Energy Medicine Resource Bundle with handouts for my most effective energy healing skills! While you are there, check out my award-winning books and programs that can teach you everything you need to know to live a healing way of life and awaken your greater health.

     Thank you for supporting this blog by using the amazon link embedded in this article for ANY purchase.  Your support is greatly appreciated!