Monday, May 9, 2016

How to Overcome Victim Mentality

     "You only get to be a victim once.  After that you're a volunteer."  ~ Naomi Judd, River of Time

     I had a dream recently that I'd like to share with you. It involved a character who was in victim consciousness, or victim mentality. Wikipedia defines victim mentality as "... an acquired (learned) personality trait in which a person tends to regard him or herself as a victim of the negative actions of others, and to behave like it were the case—even in the absence of clear evidence."  This would include seeing yourself as the victim of the negative actions of the universe, God or a higher power.

     In the dream, the character became lost. Even though an elevator was right in front of her, she remained stuck, unable to move because she couldn't find the person who was supposed to tell her what floor to go to. Indeed, when we are in victim consciousness we feel powerless and dependent on others to tell us what to do.

     Dream themes are metaphors. In this dream the elevator is a metaphor for moving or ascending from one level of consciousness to another. The dream elevator is a symbol of personal growth. The message of the dream is this: When we are living as a victim, we lose our way on our path of personal evolution and become stuck, even though the path is right in front of us. But even if we think we are hopelessly lost, the solution to the issues of our lives are within us. We just have to take off the victim glasses to see it.

     Most people have been victimized in some form or another. But being victimized doesn't make you a victim. It conditions you to believe you are a victim. And as long as you believe you are a victim, and think like a victim, your life circumstances are not going to change. Change comes through changing your beliefs about yourself.

     You Are a Creator

     The first thing to realize is that you are not a victim, you are a creator. Which may be hard to believe if you are repeatedly experiencing mistreatment and misfortune in your life. This is because you create from your energy patterns, and your beliefs shape your frequencies. In other words, if you believe you are a victim, you put out a "victim vibe." You haven't done anything "bad" or "wrong"!  It is unconscious. But once you become aware of it, you bring it to consciousness and can do something about it.

     Here's the tricky part.  What I have observed is that people tend to judge and attack themselves once they realize they have been unconsciously creating victim experiences in their life. Or they will feel embarrassed or guilty. But this is more victim mentality! In order to shift out of victim consciousness, choose compassion for yourself. Have compassion for the part of you that has been wounded and conditioned to feel like a victim. And focus on what you are willing to change.

     The Magic of Willingness

     I know the title of this post is to "overcome" victim mentality, but I only used that word because it's the word people usually use when searching on this subject. But it's not about overcoming. Its about healing, and that involves shifting from disempowered to empowered.

     What you need to move forward in life is willingness. In order to get on the elevator in the dream, you need to be willing. Because willingness empowers you. Willingness shifts your energy out of victim vibe! All you need to do is complete this sentence with what you are willing to do:

     Even though I've been conditioned to believe I am a victim, I am now willing to..

     ....change how I look at my life circumstances.
     ...let go of my need to know exactly where I'm going.
     ...consider that I am a creator, not a victim. 
     ...have compassion for the wounded part of me.

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